


Still Waters Run Deep

by HeyAssbuttImBatman



Series: Kliego Week 2019 [2]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Fluff maybe?, Ghosts, Kidnapping, Kliego Week 2019, M/M, Shitty Motels, baths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 14:28:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18830530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeyAssbuttImBatman/pseuds/HeyAssbuttImBatman
Summary: “You can come in and join me, you know,” Klaus says loudly. The water makes a soft rustling sound when he shifts. “I haven’t spontaneously grown another dick since the last time you saw me naked.”He grins; he can imagine the conflicted look on Diego’s face as he shifts from foot to foot outside the door. But Diego surprises him. There’s barely a moment’s hesitation before the door opens and Diego slips into the motel’s tiny bathroom.





	Still Waters Run Deep

**Author's Note:**

> Day Two: Bed Sharing
> 
> EDIT AS OF 05/20/2019: This fic has been beta read for typos and grammar mistakes.

Klaus only realizes he’s been in the bath for over an hour when Diego starts pounding on the bathroom door.

“Hurry up, already, I need to shower, too.”

“You can come in and join me, you know,” Klaus says loudly. The water makes a soft rustling sound when he shifts. “I haven’t spontaneously grown another dick since the last time you saw me naked.”

He grins; he can imagine the conflicted look on Diego’s face as he shifts from foot to foot outside the door. But Diego surprises him. There’s barely a moment’s hesitation before the door opens and Diego slips into the motel’s tiny bathroom.

Diego is splattered with blood that’s almost definitely not his and wearing a leather harness that looks something straight out of bad BDSM porn, but he has the _gall_ to raise a judgemental eyebrow at Klaus.

“Really?” he says dryly.

“What? Do you know how rare it is for motels to have bathtubs?” Klaus sits up fully and tilts his head up expectantly. Diego rolls his eyes but there’s a fond smile on his face, and he leans over and kisses Klaus sweetly.

“How long have you been in here?” he murmurs against Klaus’s lips. Klaus blinks.

“How long have you been gone?”

A huff of laughter, soft and warm against Klaus’s mouth.

“You’re going to get sick like this,” Diego says. He swipes a hand through the dirty bathwater and yanks it out almost immediately with a hiss.

“Injured?” Klaus asks, eyes narrowing the slightest bit.

“The water is freezing,” Diego says. “Forget sick, you’re going to freeze to death if you keep sitting here. Look, your lips are already starting to turn blue.”

“I’m fine,” Klaus says dismissively. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Diego rolls his eyes like Klaus is the one being unreasonable.

“One of them managed to get in a lucky hit when I was distracted. The rib is bruised at most, so chill out.”

Klaus smiles widely and relaxes back against the tub, spreading his arms along its dirty sides like he’s lounging in the lap of luxury. “Why, Diego,” he purrs. “I thought you wanted to me to get warmer.”

Diego levels him with an unimpressed look and reaches into the tub to unplug the drain. Klaus makes a protesting noise.

“My bath!” he says. There’s a snort from behind him, and Klaus turns to glare over his shoulder. “Shut up, Ben, you’re not helping.”

Ben sticks out his tongue. He has one tentacle out, waving lazily in the air like a palm frond under the surface of a dark lake. The mass of terrified ghosts huddling in the corner can’t stop staring at it, and Klaus would feel bad for them if Ben wasn’t the only thing keeping them from driving him insane.

“I agree with Ben,” Diego says. 

“You don’t even know what he said!”

“Doesn’t matter.” Diego stands up, groaning and clutching at his chest. “Jesus, we need to get new jobs. I’m getting too old for this.”

“Come on, you know you love it,” Klaus says, making grabby hands at his towel. Diego obligingly hands it to him so Klaus can dry himself off. “We have pretty good benefits. Dental and shit, you know. Besides.” He looks up and grins, and Diego closes his eyes.

“Klaus.”

“You can’t be getting old when we have all the time in the world to finish our contracts.”

“For the of God. Get out of the bathroom. And take your ghosts with you, I don’t want them staring at me while I shower.”

Klaus sniffs as if offended. “Fine,” he says, walking into the main room. “I hope you enjoy your warm showers, you pussy.”

The door slams behind him. Ben and the other ghosts float out of the bathroom as the shower starts up, sputtering like an old man coughing around his dentures.

“One of these days he’s going to beat your ass,” Ben tells him.

“Nah, he loves me.” Klaus lets his towel fall to the floor and rifles through his small suitcase. This was supposed to be a short job, so he packed light, and now most of his clothes are either bloodstained or sweat-stained. “Hmm. Commando it is, then.”

“Going to sleep?” Ben asks. Klaus falls back onto the single bed with a gusty sigh.

“It’s past midnight and I haven’t slept since we got back from ancient Rome,” he says. “I’m going to sleep for a _week_.”

“No, you’re not!” Diego calls from the bathroom, voice muffled. “We have a job to do.”

“Killjoy,” Klaus mutters. He gets comfortable underneath the scratchy blanket and waits for Diego to finish up. A few minutes later, the shower cuts off and Diego emerges, scrubbing vigorously at his hair with a towel. Klaus sits up and holds out his arms invitingly. “Come on, loverboy.”

“Give me a minute.” Diego pulls on sweatpants and a t-shirt, smirking and going deliberately slower when Klaus makes an impatient noise. “Slow your roll, the bed isn’t going anywhere. I have something for you, anyway.”

Klaus bats his eyelashes. “A present? For little ol’ me? You shouldn’t have.”

“It’s for both of us,” Diego says, walking over to the closet. When he pulls open the door, Klaus’ mouth drops. “Tonight wasn’t a total bust,” Diego says. He looks into the closet and smiles at the girl tied up there, her eyes spitting white fire at him. She is tied to a chair, gagged, and has a pair of noise-cancelling headphones over her ears, which Klaus appreciates because he remembers her strange powers and the damage they can cause.

“Which one is this again?” he asks, slipping out of bed and going to join Diego. He stands in front of the girl, eyes roving over her form curiously, uncaring of his nudity. Diego immediately wraps an arm around Klaus’ waist and tucks himself into Klaus’ side.

“Four,” he says, kissing the underside of Klaus’ jaw. “Their secret weapon, if I remember correctly.”

“Well,” Klaus says. “Not so secret anymore. Think she has any good information?”

“I don’t know. That’s what interrogation is for, remember?” Diego pauses to yawn into his shoulder. “But tomorrow. I just want to sleep right now.”

“Only a few hours,” Ben says. “We can’t afford to waste time.”

“Ben’s right,” Klaus says. “We can only sleep for a bit. Every extra hour is another hour wasted.”

“And another part of our paycheck flushed down the shitter,” Diego grumbles. He slams the closet door shut. “Fucking bureaucrats. Where do they get off skimping us on our paychecks when they have no idea what it’s like being in the shit?”

Klaus shrugs and tugs Diego onto the bed. It takes a bit of shuffling before they get comfortable. Diego’s hair is still wet but Klaus doesn’t mind the water dripping slowly onto his collarbone. He loves Diego like this, all sleepy and shower-soft and murderous. Diego’s still grumbling to himself and Klaus hides his smile in Diego’s hair.

“Ben, be a dear,” he says, and his hands glow blue as he makes Ben corporeal. A minute later, the lamp clicks off and Ben disappears into that in-between place he refuses to describe, taking the other ghosts with him kicking and screaming.

Diego relaxes as soon as Klaus whispers the all-clear. Even in front of Ben, showing affection is hard for Diego, but Klaus doesn’t mind. It means he gets to keep this Diego all to himself—this Diego who presses his face into Klaus’ neck and wraps an arm around his waist; who would rather be the little spoon than fuck, most nights; who smells like Klaus’ shampoo and cheap hotel soap and the coppery tang of blood that never truly leaves either of them.

In the closet, Number Four struggles, but Diego’s knots hold her fast to her chair and all she can do is scuttle uselessly around the limited space. She tires herself out after a while. Klaus pulls Diego closer and tugs the blanket higher up on their shoulders. They’re in the middle of a mission—the old man isn’t going to find himself, after all—but Klaus thinks they can afford just a few hours of calm in the middle of this shit storm.

**Author's Note:**

> idk what this au is to be honest. diego and klaus take the place of hazel and cha-cha as the agents the commission sent to kill number five, ben is still dead, and vanya can control her powers and is a member of the umbrella academy. i might explore this idea more in the future, maybe.
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